Yep, That Happened

So this one time last night I sat in bed with the TV on, a giant bag of school work sitting on the side of the bed, the computer on my lap, and the dog sprawled out next to me.  When out of the corner of my eye I noticed SOMETHING running along the bedroom wall.  At first I thought it was a spider or some kind of insect.  "Oh my god!" I shouted when I focused and realized there was a small lizard IN MY HOUSE.  It scurried underneath the armoire.  I jumped out of bed, my stomach in knots, wondering what I was going to do.  After waiting for a bit to see if it came out from the other side of the dresser, I secretly hoped it wouldn't because I had no idea how I was going to capture it.  The dresser stands on legs about 6 inches tall so I lay down on the floor and nervously peeked under the dresser.  That lizard was right smack in the middle of the back of it.  After a few seconds Rigby woke up and joined me down on the floor.  I thought about pointing it out to her but didn't really want a dead or partially dead lizard in my house either.
I scrunched my face up and whined knowing that I had to figure something out and not wanting to.  But I couldn't just leave it there.  So the sides of the dresser were barricade in case it tried to come out, it would have to use the front.  Armed with a trashcan, I made a lot of noise and smacked a flip flop on the ground trying to get it to move.  The lizard moved in between the base board and the carpet.  I think it might have been trying to crawl under the carpet.  So that wasn't working.  Rigby was left in charge of guarding the lizard as I ran downstairs and grabbed a broom and large, handled dustpan.  Things were getting serious!
Panic set in when, while running back up the stairs, Rigby met me halfway.  "You're supposed to be watching the lizard!" I told her, worried that now it was running loose in the house and I'd never find it until it was grown and tried to crawl into bed with me.  (shivers)  The lizard was still under the armoire. Thankfully?
After a few pokes with the broom and screams when it moved, it tried to run out the side (I had to unblock it because it was too dark to see).  I stopped and regrouped, trying to logically solve this problem.  There were a few whimpers about the situation, and then I pulled it together.  The dustpan JUST fit between the side of the dresser and the wall so I held it there while lying on the floor with the broom in the other hand.  I tapped the area right behind the lizard with the broom, gradually moving it towards the side where the dustpan was.  When it was finally was in plain sight, the broom brought it forward and into the dustpan.  There were a few dicey moments with the thing trying to crawl out of the pan, but with a lot of quick movements (and screaming), I kept the lizard inside.  I ran back down the stairs, shaking that thing to keep the lizard at the bottom and still whining.  But, in the end, I made it outside and dumped it over the fence.  My heart was beating so fast I thought I might have a heart heart attack.  It took me a minute to calm back down, tell myself that there weren't anymore (fingers crossed there isn't a family living under the bed) and resume the work that I was doing before the lizard sighting.  And that was just the beginning of the night.
A few minutes later, Rigby came to me like she does when she needs to go outside.  I got back out of bed, walked out of the bedroom with her, and on the landing that's where I saw it.  Rigby must have been channeling my nervous energy because in the time it took me to go back to work and her to come to me, she had diarrhea all over the 2nd floor landing.  All I wanted to do was get the school work done and go to bed, but instead I let her outside and then went spent the next 30+ minutes cleaning the landing.  Yuck!
I thought maybe I had just freaked her out with all my screaming and shaking the dustpan and broom around.  But no, she was sick.  I had to get up and let her out about five times during the night before around 2:00am when I just left her outside.
Poor baby.  I felt bad,  but she didn't have to get up and go to work in the morning.  Needless to say, today was a LONG day.  Now, I'm back in bed, with another bag full of work.  Rigby is by my side again (so far things seem to be ok intestinally) snoring loudly.  She didn't get much sleep last night either.