In honor of Father’s Day…
My dad was the most punctual person I know. Anytime we went somewhere as a family we never arrived on time, but rather early. Always early. As a teenager that irritated me, especially when we traveled and had to leave for the airport three or four hours before our flight. We had some family friends who were notoriously late for plans, not 5-10 minutes late more like 30 to 40 minutes late and sometimes over an hour. Even when we were meeting them my dad would insist that we arrive early to our destination. When I questioned why we continued to arrive early to meet these people who were always late he would say things like, “Well, it’s just rude to be late” or “When you are late, you’re essentially saying that your time is more valuable than some one else’s”. I just didn’t get this as a kid. Being an only child meant that I went most places with my parents and had to entertain myself a lot of the time. Arriving earlier than necessary made that time even longer.
I always wondered where his need for punctuality came from. Was his family always late for things when he kid? Did his military background account for it? Maybe he was just Type A. Whatever it was, he was on a personal mission to be punctual.
As strange as I thought it was, as soon as I became responsible for getting myself around, I became EXACTLY the same way. I am never late, EVER. In fact, most of the time I am early too. I have a couple of friends that are perpetually late for things. When I’m meeting them I try to be late just so I’m not waiting around for them. When I try to be late, I’m not able to. A low-grade panic sets in when I’m not “on my way” in a timely matter.
Is this because I always have my dad’s voice in the back of my head? Or maybe I’m Type A as well? A little of both I reckon.
Happy Father’s Day to my dear Dad and to all the other Dads out there!
Some other Father’s Day posts.
It's just bad manners to be late. What you are saying is that your time is more important than mine. And that has nothing to do with my type, 'A' or otherwise.
ReplyDeletePlus I like the getting there so I've no problem with seeing the journey as a chore. Even 'planes. I can knock fun out of them too.
@Vince - a minute or two late here and there eh, but perpetual lateness does come across as self absorbed. Totally agree about the journey adding to the fun except slightly less when traveling on the flying metal death traps. With my destination in mind I can do it, but the take off and landing is definitely white knuckled.
DeleteI am not a fan of lateness! The only people I cut a break are people with little kids. Small people can make it very difficult to be punctual! : )
ReplyDelete@becky - yes people with kids have to work way harder at it don't they. However, many times when my students are late for school it's because the parents weren't able to get their own selves outta bed and out the door on time.
DeleteWhen I was little, Dad was always late.
ReplyDeleteMom would tell him an event started well before it did, but he was so engrossed in his work that time slipped by him. Always in the moment my Dad and when he finally arrives, he's fully tuned in.
Dads, gotta love em.
@gpd - yes my dad was a good egg. I miss him.
DeleteI can relate to the having to entertain yourself, I wasn't the only kid but my sisters were 9 and 11 years older than me....and they married at 18 so I barely grew up with them...and they were too old to play with anyways...and since my parents were older, all of their friends' kids were grown...and that meant reading books or coloring when we visited. Kids today whip out their parent's cell phone to play games, have a DVD in the car or an iPad to keep themselves company...I imagine your waiting was spent like mine.
ReplyDeleteI am never late either...but not extremely early. WHen my students arrive late I always ask them what they would do if I was late every day...I get some funny answers.
@marey - yes! Books, paper, crayons and pencils. My mom would have sooner made us act out a play than let me watch tv in the car on a family trip let alone a trip to the grocery store.
DeleteI'm not totally anal. Five, either way is fine. I really worry outside of that and imagine all sorts of scenarios all centered on A&E.
ReplyDelete@vince - I don't think your previous comment was anal at all. I agree! :)
DeleteWith everyone having cell phones, being more than a few late and not texting or calling about it does lead to worry, which adds to the rudeness really. I'm assuming a&e is similar to our emergency rooms?
My mom definitely had some anxiety about being late which trickled down to all of us. I used to be always really early but now it doesn't always work getting 3 little people ready as well. I always text if I am going to be more than 5 minutes late. It makes me crazy to be late and I start to get so anxious. I have this other half of mine that is notoriously late. I swear he doesn't know how to tell time. His whole family is that way. Sometimes I am amazed we can function together being so polar opposite. Biggest fights for sure are about lateness! What can you do? How can you make a person be on time?
ReplyDelete@jill - I vaguely remember some of those late fights. :)
DeleteBeing late is rude. I agree that everyone's time is valuable...not everybody follows this rule though!!!! ;)
ReplyDeleteBeing late is rude. I agree that everyone's time is valuable...not everybody follows this rule though!!!! ;)
ReplyDelete@jlo - exactly
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