I wrote this last week but time got away from me and I am just now getting a chance to post it. At this time, we are wrapping up our 3rd week of test prep…
As I’ve mentioned in some of the comments, we are in the second week (of a four week stint) of STAR test practice. It is truly painful. I HATE it. The first week isn’t awful, but by the second week I always want to stick #2 pencils into my eyes. My team and I have come up with all sorts of bribes motivational gimmicks to keep the kids from nodding off and rolling out of their chairs and onto the floor. Even worse, is I have a student teacher who started with us the very first day of test prep, so right now all I’m modeling for her is the part of education I hate the most! But at least she got to hear a good one today…
One of the standards we reviewed today was plural nouns. Second graders have to know the four plural noun rules and all the basic irregular plural nouns. We were on rule #4 – If the noun ends in ‘f’, change the “f” to “ves". The kids had brainstormed a couple of words that follow the rule and then kind of hit a wall. Their hands were up, they wanted to share out a word, but drew a blank when called on. G raised his hand, but had nothing. I gave him hint…
Ms. D – G, if you get married when you are grown up, you will be the husband and she will be the….?
G – WIFE! (shouted excitedly)
Ms. D – Right! (writing it on the board). So if all of you boys get married when you grow up, there will be a lot of….?
Wait for it…
2-3 students – (shouting) BABIES!
When the kids say something like this, it’s important to keep very calm and not let them know you are ready to burst out laughing. If they sensed I thought it was as funny as I did, they would have all started shouting out, “BABIES! BABIES” over and over and over again. At that moment, the other two adults in my room (my student teacher and the reading helper) glanced up at me, almost shaking with laughter. We knew we couldn’t laugh out loud, but wanted to more than anything. I pulled it together…
Ms. D – Well, maybe there would be a lot of babies (with only a hint of laughter that a couple of my most perceptive kids picked up on), but what would the plural of ‘wife’ be?
The kids quickly settled down and I was finally able to get “wives” out of them. For the rest of the day, it made for a good story in the staff room.
My student teacher, for now, sits in the back of the room and takes notes about how the classroom is run most of the day. I walked over to her during another transition and asked her if she took notes on that. Yep, she did! It was a gem.
Now being in our third week, all the excitement of test prep has worn off, and the kids aren’t quite as into the bribes as they were in the previous two weeks. When having the students take out their practice test materials yesterday, D (the one who shot me with an imaginary shotgun earlier this year) groaned audibly, “Test practice makes me tired.”
Me too D, me too.
Since these test aren't really to draw data about the kids except in the most raw sense and are about measuring you through them. You'd truly have to wonder why a moderator like that chick shadowing you mightn't be a sounder method. As to the validity of data, even if you compared all kids in a town that started school on the same day that were exactly the same age how do you input the effect of engaged and non-engaged parents. While those trying to help in the education of their kids without any education themselves, and in another language as their main medium for operating is just insanity.
ReplyDeleteHow it can be justified (-good programme btw-) that the better part of 100 hours is devoted to this testing rubbish at that age is beyond me. And for what it's worth has anyone tried measuring the loss of these weeks on the kids.
@Vince - I've spent the last 10 minutes replying and it has disappeared! Here's the gist...observation of teachers would be a far better way of judging teacher performance. However we are only formally observed every 2-3 years, once or twice in that year. Instead the test scores are what is primarily used to label teachers effective or ineffective. Luckily I'm really good at teaching the test, but it's what I hate most about my job. There are so many variables that dictate whether a student does well on these tests (parent's education, language, and socio-economics are biggies and what my kids are challenged with), often the least of which is the teacher. Wow! 100 hours!?!? I hadn't totaled up the time before. Ugh!!! That is ridiculous. Think about what I could be teaching if I weren't teaching test taking tricks to 7 year olds. Thanks for the thoughtful comments, as usual.
DeleteGreat post and Vince's comments are very interesting - thought provoking.
ReplyDeleteYour April pages are lovely, so colourful :-) lots of other fab journal pages too
Anne x
@lp Lou - yes, they are. Thanks for coming by and for the kind words.
DeleteWell the 100 hours is a rough tot. 5x5x4=100
ReplyDelete@vince - no, as depressing as it it, the # is about right. At least 3.5 to 4 hours a day. Maybe a little less on Friday. So fun!!!!! :(
DeleteVery funny!
ReplyDelete@Jill - I knew you would like it!
ReplyDeleteToo cute! In kindergarten no one gets it and I have to bite my lip...and wait to share it with my co-workers later. One of the better ones was a kid who came into class early and told me, "My mom peed on a stick and now she's pregnant!" (pregnancy test stick.)
ReplyDelete@Marey - Ha ha! They don't have any shame, do they?!?
ReplyDeleteFunny! I can't wait to get the test over with! Oh, wait...then give them the ELA trimester and the math Trimester. *sigh*
ReplyDelete@Jlo - Bleh! We have one more week of prep and then 2 weeks of testing. After that, the last 5 weeks of school, will be fun, oh and my student teacher will be taking over full time! So I'll get ready for next year. :)
ReplyDeleteShould I be slightly embarrased that a second grader knows more grammatical rules than I do?
ReplyDeleteI still don't know what a preposition is. The horrible part is that the more people explain it to me, the less I understand it!
I have figured out that if I watche a lot of Bette Davis movies then try to emulate how she speaks, it all works out in the end.
Maybe you should teach your kids the Bette Davis Method???
@Hula - Over the last couple of years, the standards have icreased - concepts that we learned in 4-6th grade are now being taugh in 2nd. Instead of learning a few standards REALLY well, they know a little bit about a lot of standards. In ed's current state, quantity beats out quality. However,if you were my student, you'd know what a prep phrase was! :) If I ever have trouble with grammar, I'll try that method.
ReplyDeleteKimberly I have to admire you for not being more verbal about the tests. Testing is so frustrating, I imagine we lose more and more good teachers to the irritations. How are you able to not laugh. We have to be so careful when the 3 year old says or does something funny but not appropriate, we have to choke back the laughter and smiles.
ReplyDelete@bankerchick - ha I think I have been pretty obnoxious about it, so thank you. Yes education, in its current state, has a hard time holding on to teachers as many quit with 5 years or less. Until "they" realize testing kids doesn't make them smarter, the job will continue to include teaching to the test!
ReplyDeleteNot laughing out loud is hard sometimes, but the consequences are worse! :)
It makes me tired just by thinking about it!
ReplyDeleteThanks very interesting blog!
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