When it comes down to it, there are two things that I truly am scared of. One is a phobia and one is a worry.
Snakes are my phobia. Just writing the word snake just now made me shiver. I can't look at them in real life, on TV, or even in a picture. Thinking about them makes me lift my legs of the floor and sit on my feet. Once when I was about 12 years old I was camping at the river with my family. We spent one afternoon at the water's edge; swimming, fishing, playing. Shortly after coming to onto shore from a swim, my cousin was fishing on a rock in the river and a big, black snake swam over to the rock and lunged at him. He waved his fishing pole around trying to scare it away. We all screamed and did not go back in the water. I don't think that was the origin of my phobia, but it sure didn't help. Part of the 2nd grade science curriculum that I teach is about animals. Snakes are so very high interest, especially to the boys, so I have pictures and books about snakes that I keep in the research center. Inevitably, a very excited student runs up to me during "research" time and sticks a snake picture under my nose, "Look Miss Delight! Isn't it cool?" I squint my eyes and pretend to look at it and nod. I am constantly worried that if I show my fear that one of my kids would bring one to the classroom. Then I shiver on the inside.
My worry is family related. My immediate family is very small - my mom, my dad, and me. All of my grandparents are gone and my dear dad passed away about four years ago. Other than a step aunt and some step cousins, my mom is the only family I have left. I worry that if something happens to my mom, I am completely alone. I worry about that a lot. That scares me to death. I don't know what I would do if the only person who cares about me every single day isn't here anymore. This is the worst kind of fear. I have no control over it.
OK, I'm pretty tech savvy, but for the life of me I can't figure out how to post this little sign with the link, so here's the link to the little sign for our Writer's Workshop coordinator...Mama's Losing It.
I'm not wild about snakes myself, PD. I've read that some phobias (like snakes or dogs) are things we are born with.
ReplyDeleteI tend to think that fear of being alone in the world is in the same category. We're born with the fear of being alone.
Here from Mama Kat's...I am soooo with you on the snake thing. I live here in Phoenix...I really haven't seen too many snakes...but have seen a couple of them on my hikes on the nearby mountain trails. I hate them. I can hardly wait till we don't see them rattlers...usually around mid October...then my hikes are a joy. And that fear of being alone...must be just awful.
ReplyDeleteI don't care for snakes, I don't have a phobia, but I certainly don't want to see one in my vicinity!!
ReplyDeleteWhen it comes to driving in the mountains, however, I am a complete mess. From the moment that I know that it's happening (vacation, day-trip, when we moved to Colorado!!), I start panicking. Fun.
I'm with you on the snake thing for sure.
ReplyDeleteOn being alone, I can't relate on the same level as you because I have four children and ten grandchildren....but, I do think about it, and in reality we are all alone in a sense. We can love someone and rely on them for certain things, but when all is said and done "we" are just "me".
OK, it's past my bedtime, but let me just say I'm glad Jordan won tonight, and I think you should apply for season 12. :)
on the html section, inside of the tag for your picture (which should look like < a picture location info / a> ),
ReplyDeletetype the following after (No spaces)'< a':
h ref="http://www.website.com"
If you want it to open in a new window, also enter (no spaces):
target = "_blank"
Well, I'm pretty much of a loner so I'm not so afraid of being alone, but I'm with you on the sn___s, a word which I have a hard time typing, too.
ReplyDeleteI had a difficult time writing about my fear of sn___s and couldn't use a photo or even a drawing of one.
My response to Mama Kat's writing workshop is HERE.
Both my parents have passed away, & I am an only child. I'm alone in a sense( but do have 4 semi-close relationships~they'd say very close, but I know what I hold back), but it is because that is the way I constructed my life of late. When I am ready to open up more(if I am) there are people I could be much closer to, or accept into an inner circle. I am the one standing in the way of that.
ReplyDeleteYou can be without parents, but not truly alone, if you open your heart to people and accept what flows back to you.
Good thing you didn't see the snake in the boy's bathroom today! You would have peed your pants!
ReplyDeleteAnd I understand your worry. We're not exactly the same as your mom, but you'll never be left alone. (Except those days when you want to be left alone!)
Spiders for me...
ReplyDeleteAre you sure Mayo isn't a fear? I'm pretty scared thatt hat is what we are going to be served Tuesday.
Alone...never, unless you bring your IPod. ;)
Spiders for me...
ReplyDeleteAre you sure Mayo isn't a fear? I'm pretty scared thatt hat is what we are going to be served Tuesday.
Alone...never, unless you bring your IPod. ;)
I know what you mean about being alone--since my mom and my sister died I do feel like there's no one left from my childhood. My dad is still alive, but he wasn't really around. My stepsister is my rock now.
ReplyDeleteI have a pretty large extended family and my parents are both living, but honestly, Pumpkin, sometimes I think about my Mom or Dad dying and it makes me weep. I know what you mean about having that kind of support and love. I mean parents are the best unconditional lovers there are on the planet. At least it sounds like your Mom is and my parents definitely are. Losing loved ones is hard. I pray that you have your mom for many, many more years.
ReplyDelete